It is only a fool who does the same thing repeatedly and expects different results. Praying for a husband is no exception.
It is sad reading comments of genuine ladies who are struggling with being single yet they keep telling themselves God will bring a husband in His own time.
Waiting on God for a husband is great. I highly recommend that ladies pray to get their husbands. But when you take ‘waiting on God for a husband’ too far, it is just as deadly as getting into marriage without God’s guidance.
I read a comment of a lady who was 65 years old and had waited on God for a husband for over 40 years. 40 YEARS!!!
Let’s be honest, these are not the Biblical days where people used to live 500 years. Secondly, you are not Sarah who will miraculously get Isaac at 90 years.
You are a beloved daughter of God and your Father in heaven has given you a desire for marriage. He intends that you enjoy it in the few days He has allocated you under the sun.
If you fail to discern the seasons of God, you will go to the grave a bitter woman. I don’t want you to go to the grave single. That is why I am writing this article.
‘Tired of Praying for a Husband’ is a Blessing
I’ll start by congratulating you for getting tired of praying for a husband. In Ecclesiastes 3, the teacher says there is a time to search and a time to give up. Time comes when giving up is the best decision.
Giving up praying doesn’t mean you have stopped believing God, it means you have gotten tired of doing things blindly.
When you give up praying, you will need to do something else. The desire to get a husband won’t disappear when you give up praying. That is why you will need another approach in finding a husband.
When I say another approach, I don’t want you to start thinking of doing it the way the world does it. Never! We are children of God and everything we do must reflect His holiness.
The different approach will be more Godly than the praying you have been doing. You’ll go through it and see for yourself.
Right now, I want to convince you that you have done the right thing to give up praying for a husband. Don’t feel guilty about it.
Also, don’t sideline the desire to get married. That desire was put in you by God and no matter what you do to mask it, it will always pop up.
Change your Approach
Don’t change your focus from getting a husband to ‘serving the Lord’. Let your focus remain on getting a husband. Only change your approach. That is how you find success.
Change how you approach the following areas:
1. How you Pray
In a previous article, I explained how you can know when to stop praying for a husband. But it is more important to know how to pray for a husband before you bother about knowing when to stop.
If a lady prays the wrong way for a husband, it is advisable that she learns the right way of praying for a husband before she gives up praying all together.
I explained in the other article the right approach of praying for a husband but I will repeat it here.
The very phrase ‘praying for a husband’ is misleading. I believe it should be stated ‘Praying to God to get a husband’.
When a lady starts ‘praying for a husband’, her focus is on the husband. That is already a huge mistake. At no point should you ever make a prayer for your future husband unless God has asked you to do so.
Your prayer must be strictly between you and God. The aim of praying should be to align yourself for marriage.
The man who is to marry you has his own relationship with God. Let him be molded for you. I am a man and I assure you that we too have an insatiable desire for marriage.
We also pray hard to get wives. Never assume that you are the only one pushing for marriage. Both the prayers of the man and the woman are responsible for any two God ordained people to get together in marriage.
If you waste your time praying for the man, he will be ready for marriage when you are not and God won’t bring him until you are ready.
If you make yourself ready, God will pressure the man to come for you even without you saying a single prayer. God is wise.
Therefore, if your prayers have been about the man, it is time to shift your focus.
Get a copy of the eBook I wrote about praying to get a husband to learn step by step what you need to pray for and what to expect after each step.
2. How you think about Marriage
It is sad that many Christian ladies have been led to believe that marriage is strictly an assignment from God. I agree that marriage should be for God’s glory but at the same time, it is for our enjoyment.
Leaning too much on the side of ‘marriage is an assignment’ will increase the fear of being out of God’s perfect will. Knowing that marriage is for your enjoyment too will help you balance.
The world leans too much on the side of ‘marriage is for enjoyment’. That is why they divorce when they don’t find marriage enjoyable.
For a believer, you must have a good balance of marriage as an assignment and marriage as enjoyment.
Likewise, being with a man in bed is enjoyable just as it is an assignment that God gave us for procreation. Don’t married believers have intimacy for fun? It is actually strongly recommended by Apostle Paul.
Therefore, don’t buy into the sickening philosophy that marriage is purely an assignment from God and not for your enjoyment.
This should help you cut down on feeling guilty when you ask God for a husband with the aim of enjoying intimate time with him. It is God who ordained it, don’t feel guilty.
3. How you think about God providing a Husband
If God was a statue that can’t feel, then it would be pointless for us to express our feelings to Him. But God has made it clear to us that He is a loving God. Jesus had compassion when He met a widow who had lost her only son. Out of His compassion, He brought the son of the widow back to life.
God is compassionate about your loneliness. It pains Him to see you in pain. Doesn’t a father feel pain when he sees his daughter in pain? Why should you think God doesn’t feel pain when He sees you in pain?
God is more than ready to give you a husband. He ordained that you enjoy marriage with a loving man.
You can only fail to enjoy marriage with a loving husband if you fail to align yourself for it.
If a 10 year old girl asks her father for permission to eat candy, she will only get it if she meets the conditions that her father set. If her father asked her to do her homework before she gets candy, no matter how much the father loves her, he won’t give her the candy unless she has done her homework.
God operates in the same manner. It is not that He doesn’t have a husband for you. Neither is it that He doesn’t want you to enjoy life with a man but there is a condition that He expects you to fulfill before He can give you a husband.
Therefore, a wise lady will be more focused on fulfilling the condition than begging God for a man.
If you are interested in knowing the conditions that God has set for ladies to fulfill before they get husbands, read the eBook I wrote about praying to get a husband.
I hope I have been of help to you. Don’t settle for being single if you have the desire to get married. If God wanted you to be single all through your life, He would have made it clear to you the same way He makes other callings clear for people.
Changing your strategy will bring you the result you want. I have witnessed several girls get married earlier than they expected because God knew they needed husbands.
Make sure you read the eBook I wrote. It is loaded with information to help single ladies that are asking God for a husband.
All the best!